Friday, April 29, 2011

All These Things I've Done (while waiting for Optus to restore my internet)

Wednesday 27th April 2011
11:29am

It’s been two whole hours since the internet originally went down. Only an hour and a half of this have I been awake for, however, having stayed up until 4am playing Final Fantasy XIV. If I had known that a catastrophe of this sort was going to hit this morning, I would have stayed up for a lot longer.

But I suppose we all think things like that. And I suppose we all think them a little too late.

You hear on the TV all the time about these things happening to people. Well, in movies, anyway. But the movies make you think that if you have a shotgun and a slightly rough-cut but very good looking main character you’re going to be fine. Pretty people with shotguns can achieve anything, says Hollywood. But what about pretty people armed with nothing? All I have here is my keyboard. My trusty keyboard, connected to my PC. But a lot of good that does me without an internet connection doesn’t it?

I just keep staring at that blinking modem light, waiting for it to stay solid. With solidity comes sanity. With solidity comes sociality. With sociality comes connection. And oh how I long to be connected once again.

I wonder if anyone has missed me yet? I wonder if my twitter buddies are wondering why it’s been over 15 minutes since my last tweet. I wonder if anyone on Facebook has noticed my absence amidst their frantic ‘liking’ of random groups that have seemingly funny titles at the beginning but then later turn out to just be stupid.

Know what the worst part is? I just know that there are people out there with internet. There are people out there blogging right now. It’s only a matter of time until they realise mine has gone down and come to rub it in my face. I don’t know what I’ll do then. I just don’t know.

2:32pm

Managed to catch a few hours of sleep, which is a wonder for me under any circumstances, but especially today. Forced myself out of bed with the hope of solidity behind me only to be met with blinking. Always blinking. I’ve always had a fear of blinking lights. Not just because they’re creepy, but because it seems as though they can never make up their mind. And the unexpected is never stable. It is never solid. Just like my modem.

I never thought he would turn on me too.

2:45pm

Ravenous. Need to eat. My last meal was yesterday, before the horror started. Searching the house the only thing I could find was a bunny. I told myself that I would never eat a poor defenceless animal, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

Caressing it’s foily skin and ringing the little bow around it’s neck I stare lovingly at the animal I am about to slaughter for my own selfish hunger. It never did anything to me. All it did was sit there, but today I was going to kill it. Nay, I was going to give it a greater purpose in life. I was going to give this bunny meaning. But not before one final goodbye.

Farewell Lindt Chocolate Bunny. I hope you find a better place in my stomach than you did in my cupboard.

4:30pm

Received a phone call from a friend saying that she still had internet. It wouldn’t last long, knowing the state of things, so I had to make a snap decision; race over there in the hopes the internet would still be there when I got there or remain in the safety of my own home waiting for the insanity of the blinking light to get to me. Easy decision I thought, so I grabbed my stuff and left as quick as I could.

7pm

Received a call from my brother who’d finally awoken from his deep slumber. It’s funny how some people do that. The technological world around him had ended, and he slept straight through it, oblivious to it all.

“Jenn, our internet seems to be back up,” he said.

For a moment I was shocked. I didn’t know what to say. All these hours without internet and suddenly, it was back. Just like that?

“Oi did you hear me? Our internet is back up!”

“I heard you Daniel, geez. Thanks for telling me”

“Now can you come home and set up our network again? I wanna play TF2 on my laptop”

9:30pm

Everything was quiet at my friend’s place; an oddity since everything is usually chaotic like a circus. We were all happily sitting watching television, grateful to have survived the technical apocalypse. My friend got off the couch and made her way to the computer to look something up, but before she could get there, a strangled cry came from the other room.

“OUR INTERNET IS DOWN!”

With fear in our eyes we all lurched towards the modem and sure enough, the light was blinking.

Blinking.

Always blinking.

Perhaps we had survived nothing at all. Perhaps this was only the beginning.

For them, anyway. I still had the internet over at my place.

End

5 comments:

  1. Don't chop the bunny Jenny!

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  2. 28 weeks later...

    Facebook and Twitter now resemble a ghost town, there haven't been any notifications for hours. In the distance, a battle cry can be heard.

    "LALALALALALAFELL!"

    Amidst the carcass of no longer blinking modems, Jenn can be found. Shotgun in hand, a chocolate eating smile and a seething hate for shitty ISPs.

    (Loved it Jenn, I'm glad you survived) ;)

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  3. I hate then that happens. Glad u came out of it ok!

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  4. Very well written. Good job Jenn.

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  5. I know some people who only go online about once a week. To which I say, "weird".

    Welcome back :)

    ReplyDelete